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Woods, water & worse/Jim Junttila

Winter outa whack

February 19, 2010
By Jim Junttila

As a journalist, I'm a bit of a news and media junkie, as are all your intrepid WW&W correspondents. Being outdoor junkies as well, we keep our fingers on the pulse of the weather.

A few years ago, we were having such an unusually mild winter, I was inspired to coin the word "Wimpter" and milked it for a column. This year it's Vancouver's turn, raising havoc with the Olympic Winter Games, while it's been wild and woolly elsewhere. Even in an El Niemi winter, there are those who wish the snow would keep up, then it won't come down. I'm sure you've heard the jokes about they shoulda had the Olympics some place where they had snow, like Dallas, Atlanta or Washington D.C.

Florida, even as far south as the Keys, has had big time fish die-offs from the unusually cold weather and water. Florida Fish & Wildlife temporarily closed snook, bonefish and tarpon seasons, then extended them on C & R only.

Everybody talks about the weather but nobody does anything about it. "When winter gets outa whack, it's our job to put it back in whack," said WW&W meteorologist Winter Solstice. "When the weather gets ugly, the least we can do is doll it up a little. Nobody makes it look good better than the Weather Channel and cable and network news."

"It's a beauty contest out there," Winter continued. "What with the Weather Channel's Alexandra Steele and Kelly Cass, CNN's Bonnie Schneider, Christi Paul on HLN; Megyn Kelly, Gretchen Carlson, every station has their counterparts."

"I don't wamna mention their employers' names so I'll just use initials: ABC, NBC, CBS, CNN, CNBC. And don't forget FOX meterologist Janice Dean. Seems like they're all vying for the foxiest meteorologist award; Talk about news and weather outa the mouths of babes. It's a regular foxfest over at Fox."

A recent WW&W opinion dynamics poll indicates that Yoopers in general wouldn't want their correspondents to be any different,

"Presentation isn't everything," said Sarah Palinen, "but it's way ahead of whatever's in second place." As you know, Sarah recently became a Fox Correspondent, yet continues contributing to WW&W. We like our weather and outdoor news good-looking, too.

"WW&W correspondents have to be more than just another pretty face," Sarah asserted. "Sure we're smart, articulate and interesting, but we're just as hot as those network correspondents, if not moreso."

I love the way Lindsey Vonn is triple dipping as a world champion skier, Olympic downhill gold medalist and Sports Illustrated swimsuit model. Covered head to toe in her white and pink racing outfit topped off by her Red Bull helmet or cavorting in a bikini in Sports Illustrated, she's tailor-made for the media.

She will be joining the WW&W correspondent corps under her previous name, Lindsey Vonnanen, and returning to her roots as a down-to-earth Finnish farm girl from Minnesota, just a hop, skip and a yump from Lake Wobegonanen, as soon as her Olympic and SI commitments allow. She's not just a world-class athlete and swimsuit model, she's a model citizen, which makes her a good role model for girls everywhere.

"Those swimsuits illustrate the kinda transparency we need in government today," said Sarah. In late breaking outdoor news, Don Kauppi reports that Copper Harbor has broken up and returned to wow, wide open water. "The past two weeks we were all froze up with 6 inches of ice and the splake bite was on," he said. "Then the wind switched and broke it up; Wednesday it started to move, and yesterday it all blew out."

When Copper Harbor is in its liquid state this late, winter's outa whack.

WW&W 2010 Winter Outdoor Calendar

Feb. 19-21, U.P. Pond Hockey Championship, St. Ignace,

Feb. 13-28, Keweenaw Whitetails Predator Hunt, 289-4522

Feb. 18-21, Ontonagon Valley Sportsmen's Club Predator Round-Up,

Feb. 27, Chassell VFW 4th Annual Ice Fishing Tournament, Jesse Sohlden, 523-9089.

Feb. 26-28, Winter Becoming an Outdoors Woman, Big Bay, Sharon Pitz 906-228-6561,

March 6, Copper Harbor Splake Ice Fishing Tournament, Don Kauppi, 289-4637, or toll-free 888-MA-NORTH.



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