Dying and death are inherent in our culture, although a reality we try to avoid at all costs.

Our culture has, in many ways, sanitized death and dying. We seldom deal with the reality of dying; as I have experienced, most do not address the certainty of the fact. They walk around it, try to recall happier pasts occasions, or refuse to acknowledge the mystery of death altogether.

Granted, it is not a pleasurable topic, but it is real. Many I have attended will not face a simple truth that we are mortal.

Life and death are part of living, part of who we are as human beings.

Time limits and biology reduce energy, health, and mobility; we all grow old. The body is mortal.

As Chaplain, I often tell my patients that death is not an end in itself but a transition. A new journey waits for the individual. If the individual has Faith, the concept of heaven or an afterlife is a reality.

I see a few people who take time to review their life, set things straight, and put their house in order.

I recently had one patient who was the opposite of what I usually see. She had cancer and was suffering a painful existence, dying slowly. She did not complain about the suffering she was enduring. When I visited her weekly, we would read the psalms and sing hymns each time I visited.

Often after 20 minutes, her enthusiasm waned as her energy could not sustain our joyous meeting–her Faith-filled every corner of the room with positive energy. Instead of me blessing her, she was blessing me.

One day we talked directly about her passing. She brightened up and told me she was going home to heaven, and Jesus was waiting to welcome her.

Her eyes closed as she spoke as if she was already viewing this spectacular vision of glory.

Then she opened her eyes and said, “You Know, I can’t wait to go home. My mother and father are there, waiting. I will see my infant son, whom I lost when he was two, my dear husband of 42 years, and my sister and brother. Please, Jesus,” she pleaded, “I want to go home.”

Her simple faith and certainty amazed me. For a moment, I saw her lining up to get on the bus to Detroit, so real was her wish. But, no, she was speaking of heaven. She was so happy to die and get to heaven and her family, knowing they were waiting for her. She was joyous and glad to be going home. She had set all earthly affairs in order and was waiting on the glory.

This is not the typical person that I deal with. Most do not want to speak of dying, yet death is part and parcel of living. Many tell me they are not afraid to die, but that is a brave face put on to fool themselves. They treat it like a necessary fact, but no more thought other than it will happen. They do not want to give time or spiritual effort to understand the mystery.

We should think about it, not necessarily death, which all humans share.

Dying is a reflection on our life. You hear the word “legacy” today, which means what we leave behind. Yes, that is important.

But what did we do in our life? What example have we set, and what values have we lived that speak to other generations?

This is the treasure. Your children, friends, and loved ones are our lasting gifts.

As Scripture tells us, “For where your treasure is, there your heart will also be” (Matt 6:21).

I often wonder, in today’s world, as we clamor for more money, stuff, and pleasure, have we lost our understanding of death?

Death in our culture has become a minor problem, sanitized and reduced to an unpleasant occurrence.

Yet, love, compassion, and community are fruits of a well-lived life.

Faith and love, these abstract items guide life and allow death its true meaning.

We can’t take our bank books, possessions, or honors. All that goes with us, in the end, is the love we gave and the love we have received.

Kathleen Carlton Johnson, Ph.D., hospice chaplain, may be reached at faithtoday2023@gmail.com.