Dear Annie: I’m in my early 30s and have been dating someone for nearly two years. On paper, he is everything my parents could have hoped for. He has a stable career; he is kind, respectful, family-oriented and well-liked by everyone. My friends and family think I have hit the jackpot.

The problem is, I am not sure I feel the kind of deep connection I thought I would have with the person I marry. There is no major conflict or red flag. I care about him a lot, but something just feels off. I keep asking myself if I am confusing comfort for love, or if I am afraid to commit to something that does not light a spark in me.

Part of me wonders if I am overthinking it, and another part wonders if I am settling because he checks all the boxes my parents value, not the ones that matter most to me. How do I know if I am marrying the right person for me, and not just the one who makes everyone else happy? — Confused by Compatibility

Dear Confused by Compatibility: Marrying someone because they make everyone else happy is a fast track to resentment. It may not happen right away, but eventually, the life you build will start to feel like it belongs to someone else — and you’ll be the one living in it.

You say there’s no big conflict or red flag, but let’s be clear: Indifference is a red flag. Marriage is not just about checking boxes. It’s about connection, partnership and the feeling that, even when things are hard, you’re in it with the right person. If you’re already questioning that before saying “I do,” listen to yourself.

You’re not overthinking. You’re being honest — and that’s something more people should do before walking down the aisle.

Do not marry someone out of obligation, fear or convenience. Marry because your heart, your head and your gut all agree. Until then, wait.

Dear Annie: I had a strange encounter recently that left me feeling confused and, honestly, a little hurt, and I’m wondering what the proper etiquette is in this situation.

I was out shopping when I spotted one of my doctors, the kind you see regularly and share quite a bit with. We made brief eye contact, and I was about to smile and say hello when he suddenly ducked into another aisle like he couldn’t get away fast enough. It was so obvious he was avoiding me that I just stood there, awkwardly wondering what I had done wrong. I didn’t approach him; clearly, he didn’t want to be seen.

To be fair, he’s no longer my doctor for other reasons, but this encounter left a sour taste. I’ve had other doctors I’ve bumped into in public who’ve been warm, friendly and respectful. Just a quick, “Hi, nice to see you” and we go on with our day. But this one? It felt dismissive and even a little unkind.

I get that doctors are entitled to privacy and time off the clock, but is it really that uncomfortable to smile or say hello back to someone you’ve seen in a professional setting? What’s the right thing to do when you run into your doctor in public? Should the patient say hello, or is it better to pretend you didn’t see each other? — Unseen and Uncertain

Dear Unseen and Uncertain: It’s perfectly reasonable to feel confused or even hurt by your doctor’s reaction, but try not to take it personally. Some health care professionals are extremely cautious about patient privacy, even in casual settings.

If you see a doctor in public, a simple smile or polite hello is always appropriate. If they respond warmly, great. If not, it’s likely more about their boundaries or discomfort than anything you’ve done.

You did nothing wrong.

“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.