Dear Annie: My best friend, “Cara,” has been dating a guy for about six months who, frankly, none of our friends can stand. He talks over her constantly, makes inappropriate jokes, and once made a rude comment about her weight right in front of us. She brushed it off like it was nothing, but I could tell she was embarrassed.

Since she started dating him, she’s pulled away. She skips our group dinners, ignores messages in the group chat, and when I ask if everything’s OK, she just says she’s “doing great!”

I’m worried she’s isolating herself, either because of him or because she knows we don’t like him — but I’m not sure how to bring it up without sounding judgmental or pushing her further away.

I miss my friend, and I’m also concerned for her. But every time I try to talk about it, she shuts down the conversation. How do I let her know I’m here for her without making her feel attacked? — Watching Her Slip Away

Dear Watching Her Slip Away: You say you don’t want to sound judgmental — but if the guy’s as awful as you describe, judgment is overdue!

Still, tread lightly. If you push too hard, she’ll pull away more. You might look like the bad guy now by voicing your opinion, but over the long haul, you’ll be the friend who saved her from a terrible mistake.

Dear Annie: I’ve worked as a dental assistant at the same small practice for eight years. I love my patients, and I get along with the dentists, but the office manager, “Diane,” is making my job unbearable.

She micromanages everything I do — double-checking my appointment notes, questioning why I take five-minute breaks and rearranging supplies I’ve already organized. She wasn’t always like this, but ever since she took a course in “leadership development,” she’s been acting like she owns the place.

I’ve tried talking to her calmly about needing more space to do my job, but she just nods and then nothing changes. The dentists are great, but they stay out of office politics. I don’t want to leave a job I’ve loved for so long, but I’m starting to dread going in.

Is it worth speaking up again — or should I start looking for a new position? — Sick of Being Micromanaged

Dear Sick of Being Micromanaged: Diane didn’t learn leadership; she learned how to be a nuisance with a clipboard.

You tried the polite route, and she ignored it. Your best bet now is to go above her and bring your concerns to the dentists. They may not love office drama, but they do care about keeping good staff — and if you’re halfway out the door, they deserve to know why.

Annie Lane’s second anthology — “How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com. COPYRIGHT 2025 CREATORS.COM