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Dear Annie

Left on Read and Left Behind

Dear Annie: My co-worker “Dan” and I started at our company around the same time three years ago. We hit it off immediately and became good friends. We’d grab lunch together, vent about work and even hang out on weekends sometimes. Lately, though, things feel … off. He’s been distant, takes forever to respond to messages and only speaks to me when necessary.

About six months ago, he started dating someone new. He hasn’t said anything about her directly, but from social media and office gossip, it’s clear the relationship is serious. I’m happy for him, truly, but I’m also wondering if his girlfriend isn’t comfortable with our friendship, or if maybe I crossed a line I didn’t realize.

Is it worth asking him, or do I need to accept that this season of friendship is just over? — Left Behind at Lunch

Dear Left Behind: Asking him will provide clarity one way or another, so it’s absolutely worth it. If he shrugs you off with a dismissive “I’m fine,” you can take that as a sign to move on from this friendship — for now. It hurts, but sometimes life changes bring shifts in closeness that have nothing to do with you. Let the friendship breathe, and if it’s meant to pick back up, it will.

Dear Annie: My sister and I are having a squabble with our other sister, and it’s turned into a major family issue that’s tremendously affecting my health.

The problem is that our sister’s kids have started posting our family issues on social media for the whole world to see. They’ve accused me of not giving them “good enough” gifts and missing out on major life events of theirs. I’ve been a single parent for 20 years. I had to work second shifts as all the kids in our family were growing up, which meant I missed out on a lot of my own kids’ extracurricular activities, too. My niece expects me to apologize for the “cheap gifts” and for not being more present for her milestones when I’ve been working.

I don’t feel I should have to apologize for doing my best under difficult circumstances. She is 35 now and acting like a spoiled brat. Am I missing something here? HELP! — The Cheap Aunt

Dear Cheap Aunt: Your niece’s behavior reflects on her, not you. Griping about gifts isn’t just tacky, it’s ungrateful. The value of a gift is in the thought behind it, not the price tag. And airing family grievances online at 35? That’s plain immature, and it leaves out a crucial part of the story: yours.

You don’t owe her an apology or an explanation. You did what you had to do, putting food on the table and showing up when you could, even when it meant missing moments you’ll never get back. Don’t reward her tantrums with a response. Step back from the drama, hold your head high and stand by the hard choices you had to make.

Follow Annie Lane on Instagram at @dearannieofficial. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com. COPYRIGHT 2025 CREATORS.COM

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