Dear Annie: I am an adult now with grown siblings, but it seems my mother’s anxiety is growing right along with us.

My mother is an incredibly anxious person. I try to be empathetic, but she hasn’t seen a therapist in years, and she completely dismisses any logical or positive reassurances meant to comfort her. At this point, I am at a loss for what to do.

Currently, her anxiety is hyperfocused on our upcoming summer family vacation. She is worried about everything: flying, hiking, driving, wildlife and fires. It feels like she actively seeks out things to worry about, operating under the assumption that none of the rest of us are planning for these risks.

When she airs these anxieties, I don’t know how to respond. I want to explain to her that preparing for a situation ahead of time is not the same thing as being consumed by worry about it. I am someone who prepares diligently so that worry doesn’t bog me down, but she can’t seem to make that distinction. Sometimes, I wonder if she is just looking for attention, and then I immediately scold myself for not being empathetic enough.

I know that once this vacation is over, she will just find something else to fixate on. How do I navigate these conversations and set healthy boundaries without losing my empathy? — An Exasperated Daughter

Dear Exasperated: Stop trying to reassure her. Anxious minds treat reassurance like fuel. Every time you engage with one of her worries, the pattern of panic and reassurance deepens.

Starve the anxiety instead. When she spirals, a simple, “I hear you, Mom” or “Yeah, maybe that could happen” is enough. A therapist who specializes in anxiety can offer tools that can break this pattern for good.

It’s worth noting that growing up with chronic anxiety in the house often leaves a mark. The fact that you’ve come out clearheaded and prepared rather than consumed is no small thing.

Dear Annie: Thirty-odd years ago, my husband and I were honored to be asked to be godparents. Unfortunately, the baptism was during a terrible winter storm, and my husband was on call for work, so our godchild’s grandparents had to step in to take our place.

Fast forward to 2026: Our godson is getting married and the ceremony is in Halifax, Nova Scotia. When I received the invitation, I responded immediately that we would attend. My husband was due to receive a $1,000 bonus which we planned to use to pay for part of the trip. Unfortunately, with the price of everything going up, we had to use that money toward bills.

I feel terrible that we won’t be able to attend his wedding and that we are letting him down again. What can I do to make it up to him, on top of sending him a very generous monetary gift? — Very Sad Godmother

Dear Sad Godmother: I suspect you’re being much harder on yourself than your godson is. Missing a baptism because of a blizzard is nothing to beat yourself up over, and neither is being unable to afford a trip decades later.

Send your regrets as soon as possible, along with a heartfelt note letting him know how much he means to you and how sorry you are to miss his special day. I’m sure he and his bride will appreciate the money, but your love and good wishes will mean even more.

And when circumstances allow, make plans to visit the newlyweds. What he’ll remember most isn’t whether you were at the wedding, but that you’ve always cared enough for him to be there when you could.

“Out of Bounds: Estrangement, Boundaries and the Search for Forgiveness” is out now! Annie Lane’s third anthology is for anyone who has lived with anger, estrangement or the deep ache of being wronged — because forgiveness isn’t for them. It’s for you. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Follow Annie Lane on Instagram at @dearannieofficial. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com. COPYRIGHT 2026 CREATORS.COM