Dear Annie: Although many years have passed since my husband died, I don’t feel any peace. There was no justice whatsoever.

A young girl talking on her cellphone (cellphone records proved this!) lost control of her vehicle on a busy early morning on the highway. Four witnesses testified to her weaving erratically all over the narrow highway lanes. My husband’s vehicle went over the guardrail to avoid her. His vehicle dropped down an embankment approximately 40 feet below and landed on its roof.

Firemen extricated him from his vehicle, and he was transported by ambulance to the hospital’s critical care unit. He suffered a brain bleed and fractures of the thoracic and cervical spine. After 26 days in a coma, my beloved husband passed away. My daughter and I lost the most wonderful father and husband. The other driver? She lost nothing. This girl had no injuries whatsoever.

The state said that she would receive no jail time, just 100 hours of community service for taking a human life. It was so obvious, even from the beginning, that her family’s wealth and connections, plus the corrupt state’s attorney, bought her way out. The state reasoned that she graduated as class valedictorian from high school and would be attending college. She had her whole life ahead of her. What about my husband’s life?

At the hearing, the judge asked her if she was talking on her phone. She looked him right in the eye, lied and said no.

People have commented that I should get over it. I can’t get over it, and I will never forgive her. There was no justice. I firmly believe that there are people who don’t have a soul or a conscience, and she is one of them. The heartache of losing him, plus the other many hardships of life, has made it very difficult for my daughter and me to survive. — Unable To Forgive

Dear Unable To Forgive: I’m so sorry to you and your daughter for the loss of your husband. You both were robbed of more time with someone you loved deeply, and no matter how many years pass, that pain doesn’t simply disappear.

But holding onto this anger hasn’t punished the young woman who caused the crash; it’s only prolonged your own suffering. Forgiveness doesn’t mean excusing what happened or agreeing with the court’s decision. It means freeing yourself from carrying her actions with you every day. It isn’t easy, but you’ve already spent years carrying this burden. You deserve some relief.

A good therapist or grief support group may help you find comfort among others who understand this kind of loss. You may never find justice to your satisfaction, but I hope that, in time, you can find some measure of peace.

“Out of Bounds: Estrangement, Boundaries and the Search for Forgiveness” is out now! Annie Lane’s third anthology is for anyone who has lived with anger, estrangement or the deep ache of being wronged — because forgiveness isn’t for them. It’s for you. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Follow Annie Lane on Instagram at @dearannieofficial. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com. COPYRIGHT 2026 CREATORS.COM