Dear Annie: I’ve been married for 27 years, and by most measures we have a good, steady life. We’re healthy, financially secure and get along well. There’s no infidelity or drama.

The problem is there’s no romance or passion either. I’ve started to feel deeply lonely in my marriage. My husband is kind and dependable but distant. He’s gone all day and unwinds in front of the television at night. I crave conversation — about ideas, feelings, memories, even worries. When I try to talk about anything deeper than logistics, he listens but rarely engages.

Over the years, I’ve stopped trying as hard. I’ve filled my life with friends, books, volunteering and hobbies, but there’s still an emptiness that shows up sometimes. I miss being known by the person I share my life with.

I don’t want to blow up a marriage that’s stable and decent. But I also don’t want things to continue this way. I don’t know exactly what changed. I care about getting our emotional closeness back, but I’m not sure where to start. My efforts so far have gotten me nowhere. — Married, but Missing Something

Dear Married, but Missing Something: Your husband may not withhold conversation out of indifference. Some people are simply less fluent in emotional language. That doesn’t mean he can’t learn, but it does mean you might need to take the reins.

Small changes can matter, but they must be intentional: shared walks, one device-free evening, a simple habit of checking in. Emotional closeness rarely returns on its own; it grows from shared quality time.

Wanting connection is not a youthful luxury. It’s a lifelong need. The mistake would be deciding silently that it’s too late to ask.

Dear Annie: I recently stopped at the food court for a bite to eat when my girlfriend, after ordering, said the woman behind the counter had a black eye. It appeared she had tried to put makeup over to cover it up.

My mind quickly thought this was domestic abuse, but I obviously don’t know this person or their history.

What is the ethical response when encountering a situation like this? — Wanting To Help Others

Dear Wanting To Help: When we see something alarming, it’s natural to want to step in. But without the full picture, it’s hard to know what would truly help and what might unintentionally cause harm.

A black eye can come from many things, and assumptions, even with the best intentions, can put someone in an uncomfortable or risky position. If you truly believe someone is in immediate danger, you can discreetly alert a manager or, if appropriate, local authorities. Otherwise, it’s wise to tread lightly.

Sometimes the most ethical response is simply to see someone, treat them kindly and not make their day harder than it already might be.

“Out of Bounds: Estrangement, Boundaries and the Search for Forgiveness” is out now! Annie Lane’s third anthology is for anyone who has lived with anger, estrangement or the deep ache of being wronged — because forgiveness isn’t for them. It’s for you. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Follow Annie Lane on Instagram at @dearannieofficial. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com. COPYRIGHT 2026 CREATORS.COM